the sometimes maligned scott adams pursues his comic strip politics

March 28th, 2019

I think this Dilbert is inspired by that “MAGA” kid and the Catholic students facing that Native American… but the commenters here seem to be going all the place elsewhere, and probably not keeping tightly to the “notice I’m linking to the video” panel.

Previously we’ve seen Scott Adams come out in support of Fusion.  I note a line of the office-worker’s argument can be had against Dilbert is still viable even if you buy Dilbert’s premise — or, you can believe in the potential of Fusion but still hold that it won’t overtake everything in fifteen years.  I read a quote from a fusion advocate from the early 1990s stating the problem that if we had unlimited funds and a due date at the end of the century when the Aliens will be attacking — we’d be able to … come up with something crappy.  (Excess energy in, limited energy out).   The funding’s not the problem right now.  But that was then.  Probably nothing’s changed, except the reaching into the future — which is nothing has changed and everything has changed.
As it were, the argument “Why are so many people funding it then?”… is as invalid as “Thomas Edison had to keep failing”.  Unless we want to point out how highly esteemed alchemy was for even someone like Issac Newton… then again, lead can be turned to gold at about the same place as fusion is available at this moment.

overheard, and musings

March 27th, 2019

“And The Cosby Show… is the greatest television comedy of all time.”

Yeah.  And it won’t be mass marketed again until sometime after the guy is dead…

i think this was supposed to be the charles lindbergh — norman thomas ticket?

March 26th, 2019

Unlike the bilious Ed Muskie, who dismissed George Wallace’s Florida primary victory as a triumph of racism, McGovern credited Wallace’s appeal to “a sense of powerlessness in the face of big government, big corporations, and big labor unions.”  He asked Wallace for his endorsement, though as he recalls with a smile, “He said, “Sena-tah, if I endorsed you I’d lose about half of my following and you’d lose half of yours.'”  Well, maybe, Guv-nah — but just think of the coalscent possibilities of the remaining halves.

Bill Kauffman, Ain’t My America, 2008, pgs 139-140

one last pile of snot

March 26th, 2019

I.  I’ve had a couple conversations regarding Larouche.  One, a guy who grew up in The Bronx telling me that round about ’99, he was 14, and they were recruiting in his neighborhood by handing out vhs tapes.  Excited by their pitch for “Socialism” (which he seemed to think was still what they’d be pitching), his mom had to break it to him and direct him to talk to his grandparent — retired cop.  [Interesting, as this may suggest a first hand account on “Operation Mop Up” as opposed to white collar trials of the 80s].
From this, I’m suggesting that you can’t claim him as part of a “red – brown alliance“.  On the surface, they convinced my anecdotal example they were anti-globalization socialists.  It was a ruse (when aiming for mass recruits, they tended to trek left — didn’t they?), unlike the world viewpoints of your (however much you want to tint them as “brown or “beige”, and whatever detestable or disgusting characteristics they had/have ) Ron Paul, Pat Buchanan… David Duke, Willis Carto…

Trying to make sense of this, of why a fascist organization would be opposing U.S. military expansionism
This one dimensional view of the political spectrum depresses me.  I think the line for your David Dukes was “Bring the troops home, and put them on the Mexican border” — one follows the other.

II.   Throw this board comment into the hopper, if tangeantally toJustice for Jeremiah Duggan“.

As for the Death of Jeremiah it seems very mysterious. I did experience a young recruit from Denmark undergo a total personality change after being at another cardre school in Wiesbaden, Germany around 2012. He attended a weekend there, after which he agreed to spend a week in the Stuttgart local with Petraeus and Benjamin Lilloff, after which he arrived in Berlin acting very strange, unresponsive, staring at the wall, as if he had been drugged. He seemed angry and started shouting and said to one Larouchie that he will have to kill him, causing the Larouchie to run out of the room. Others pinned him down, and called the police to take him away, to eventually let him go back to Denmark, presumably to his home. Before the police arrived he kept repeating ‘I love God, I love God, I love God…’
All this was explained away by saying how some in the Berlin office think that Benjamin and Petraeus are a bit weird and act like cultists. All that Benjamin and Petraeus had to say about it was to claim that he was a stoner hooked on weed and was experiencing the withdrawal effects of not taking any for one week, when of anything he seemed out of it on drugs. Benjamin is Danish also and may have got into his head somehow using behavioural psychology and drugs. This experience reminded me of what had happened to Jeremiah in that he acted out of character in a negative way which seems to be what happens to Jeremiah at the very least, from psychological bullying if not physical bullying from maybe a small group of people, especially when he didn’t want to join.

Anyone else notice the headline for Larouche’s EIR… “Justice for the World”.  Can’t be a coincidence.  It’s in their head.  (“Their” being whoever it is that is running that outfit these days, typos proliferating over the past few years on to where we have today “Mueller” as “Muller”.)

III.  Metaphorically, it’s crazy not to believe the world’s not run by Intelligent Lizard People.  Where you go from there in fleshing out any details, you’ll run into problems immediately.  I also think you can probably refer to any politico betraying false promises as the anti-Christ.
Alice Walker.  David Icke.  (Haven’t read the Icke piece in question, so don’t know where he goes on it.)
I probably shouldn’t post that here, as I imagine the Larouche org now making a bee-line to shake Alice Walker for some shinglings.  Interesting, as she seemed to feel the need to hedge a bit in prefacing the work of Zora Neele Hurston — rolling her eyes as she did at some of her fellow Harlem Renaissancers as they made their way to tour Soviet Russia, and who had some acidic comments on Brown vs Board of Education ruling.  (Which, in truth, prefigured some Black opposition to busing).  Sometime in the future, someone will be writing a foreword to Alice Walker and have to hem and haw at a seemingly random fluctuation to David Icke?
Alex Jones was maybe more discriminating (if you’re going to gauge some judgements).  “Turd in the conspiracy theory punch-bowl” — singling out the one memorable feature of David Icke’s worldview that’s memorable and which people will tend to agree — the “Lizard People run the world” theme.   Though, he eventually had him on.   As he had on Larouche a few years’ back.
Sometime back, in writing on the recent turns of Larouche, someone posited him as having been a darling guest on alt-right media.  (Never quite sure the term “alt – right” has much meaning, but that’s another story).  Not aware of anything other than Alex Jones, who — it should be noted — hasn’t had anyone from the org back lately…
More to the point, from what I can tell, looking about to see what Alex Jones has said about the death of the man.  Here’s what I’ve found.  Point it to me if there is more.

THE post-death exit interview with Lyndon Larouche.  Chapo Trap House.

IV.   Chuck Fager on his history with the org, where he uncovers the identity of Lyn Marcus, and talks to his parents.  Larouche goes apeshit, and after a melee of sorts…

And the upshot, as an employee to Congressman Pete McCloskey…
But in 1980, after more than a year of this effort, I got an unexpected call from the boss’s office: report here ASAP, said McCloskey’s chief of staff, There’s something you need to explain.
This sounded like trouble. And it was, but it did not involve shipping cartels. Instead, it was a stunning accusation: that I was a Kremlin spy, a KGB mole. And with it was a blast from the past.
It was a new experience, sitting with a Member of Congress, explaining to him that I was not now, and never had been a KGB mole.
But the accusation was there, in a sheaf of professionally printed papers, titled an intelligence “dossier” circulated among the 500-plus congressional offices on Capitol Hill by a group called the National Democratic Policy Committee (NDPC). I’d never heard of it. Yet, I reminded myself, KGB spies in the U.S., especially federal employees, often wound up in jail.

It didn’t take long to figure out that this document was a LaRouche production, and the NDPC one of his stream of front groups.

It was brief: the FBI had reviewed their files and had found nothing that implicated me in any of the “dossier” allegations. McCloskey gave me a copy, which I framed, and hung on my man cave wall. (After all, how many other people do you know who have a letter personally signed by the FBI Director saying the Bureau has no evidence they’re a KGB mole? But after my several moves, it’s now somewhere in a box of other personally important documents. I should hunt it down; after all, you never know . . .)

And he moves on to encountering the senior Lyndon Larouche in church services… preaching the evils of cremation to souls who have cremated their loved ones.

V.  Dateline Seattle.  One thought about this… we now have the first instance where someone might encounter them (here in Seattle) and offer the standard “Lyndon Larouche?  He’s still alive?” — where the answer is “Nope”.  But… the zombie org marches on.

I was hoping not to see these idiots anymore since he died. I don’t know why I was so naive.
Well who are we to question the LaRouche Science Research Team?
I just spent 30 minutes looking up it’s leader. He’s kind of like what you would imagine if L. Ron. Hubbard would have been like if he had chosen a life of politics instead of religion.
I’ve noticed a correlation between people who say ___ is the Holocaust and actual Holocaust denial.
I have a feeling she would be like that.
Lyndon LaRouche just passed away, with nary a mention in the news.
Probably because he is completely irrelevant unless you are a maniac.

Worth positing:  The figure of scorn is, politically, a good one.  Her “New Green Deal” was launched with a decimal point error “factor of ten” problem.  The Nation could only deflect away to the bigger fancifulness of her Republican “climate change” denier” cohorts.  But — I can’t help but look at OSC and see someone involved in a “fringe” political cast outside of the Democratic party who primaried the establishment at a young age — or… a more viable variant of the supposed “LYM” candidates who aren’t going anywhere.

VI.  Diane Sare (will she be the Larouche presidential candidate in 2024?) seems to not understand the practicality of the news media outlets filing away the obituaries of notables for quick issuance upon their death.  How the hell else is this supposed to work?
Anyway… she threw the guantlet.  Time for letters to the editor to tell the truth.

What a loss for humanity. He spoke at a conference in 1988, in the midst of a political prosecution similar in striking respects to that which we encounter against an American president in the U.S. today. He said if we think of our lives not as things which are lived for pleasure in and of themselves, but as an opportunity to fulfill a purpose, a purpose which is reflected in what we bequeath to those hundreds of billions of souls waiting to be born.

If it’s true that Larouche’s words are now going to be turned into Scripture, they do need to force some kind of Nicene Council to pull together the inconsistencies, as well figure out political stances: are they still for quarantining HIV patients?

Normally, this is a pretty good local paper, with fairly reliable and fair coverage of local government and local events of concern or interest to folks in the county.
The kind of local parochial which focuses in on the community, where we can get the latest dates and notices for the Leesburg Garden Club…
It must therefore have struck more than a few discerning readers, that the obituary did little but dust off long-stale lies devised by LaRouche’s enemies, pasted together selected pieces of purportedly “objective fact” with a few buzz words, in yet another effort to convince readers that LaRouche was just a paranoid tangle of incoherence and his life, and passing, therefore insignificant.What would lead the editor to do so? Was it some personal grudge? an attempt to show that local Loudoun Nowcan sit at the table with big guys like the Washington Postor New York Times that continue their decades-long effort to obfuscate LaRouche’s actual ideas and accomplishments? A signal, maybe, that Loudoun Now can be counted on by the likes of Robert Mueller—a major player in the notoriously corrupt federal prosecution of LaRouche in the 1980s—as new efforts get underway to stop LaRouche’s national and global renaissance programs from gaining further traction?

[…] LaRouche’s voluminous writings on physical economy, science, statecraft, history, and culture, available on his movement’s websites, speak to its origins. Dread fills us all who pursue the “voluminous writings”.

Rebuttal from Molly Kronberg here.  Specific to one, but could cover any and all of the “Letter to the Editor” campaign.

VII.  Round up of what the People were saying…

If he has a grave it will probably be well-fertilized with human and canine offerings.
That’s kinda’ too bad because it would also be a good place to dance.
Great, he was the last person standing between Queen Elizabeth and total world domination.  We are so fucked.
Wow!  Hadn’t thought of him for a while.  I didn’t know the thing about opera.  As a musician, it occurs to me that he may not have known that lowering the soprano part might just make it impossible for the bass to sing his part.  Yeah, that’s just nit picky as hell but it’s where my mind went when I read it.  Oh, and why did I not know about this Queen fixation?  That’s a real hoot!

While I despised everything about LaRouche—whose lawyers I laughed out of my office when they threatened to sue the alternative newspaper where I was editor/publisher because we called him an anti-semite—I always loved one of the bumperstickers the man’s pitiful acolytes pushed along with fusion power at their airport propaganda tables: “Nuke the Whales.” It perfectly sums up what LaRouchism is all about.
With his passing, I suppose the acolytes old and new will transform his writings into scripture.

So much for his 2020 campaign.
Anyway, rest in something, or rot in something, Lyndon.
About eight years ago a couple LaRouche-ite cult followers were outside a local drugstore near me, with a rather extreme racist anti- Obama sign, (the witch doctor photo) collecting money.
I’m in my 50’s, and these two were mid 30’s. They had a 18 year old spellbound in their speech when I walk up.
I said “oh, did they let LaRouche out of prison?” And started to razz them about LaRouche’s criminal convictions and prison sentences for finance violations, mail fraud, etc in the 1990’s.
The poor 18 year old kid had no idea. O guess they don’t teach kids history at all these days when it comes to historically evil criminal candidates of the past. The poor kid wanted to erase his name from the petition he just signed after I told him about LaRouche’s past run ins with the law, cult following, etc. the two LaRouchettes were livid I was telling the kid LaRouche’s history. It wasn’t a pretty sight.
This is an over the top way to launch a 2020 campaign
Like I say- I’m glad to know he won’t by preying on children any more.

I said in 1980, “The man is a walking SNL sketch.” Four years later there he was on SNL, played by Randy Quaid.

Etc etc etc etc Back to Illinois 1986EtcCracked.
One or two small probems with this oneHere
Short podcast.

His PAC described him as a “philosopher, scientist, poet, statesman” who died on the birthday of President Abraham Lincoln, whom he celebrated in his writings.

In defense of a One World Government.

Reading the political rags: The National Review chimed in with appropriately partisan lobs at the left.  We can expect Reason’s print edition to have something — though it may just reprise what’s on their website.  Other than the Jacobin at the furthest left (unless we get into the Revolutionary Communist Party’s paper), I don’t see much from that direction — but The National Review pointedly rounds up some obituaries in bullet point fashion, and he’s not relevant enough for the likes of The Nation or In These Times to spring out at him.  Further afield… I suspect The Fortean Times will have something.

VIII.  Some more stray comments — most important items from which posted over here

John Goras  Around 2005, a bunch of LaRouche’s people were out, protesting Bush/Iraqi War. I threw them some shekels for the F of it and took some of their lit. What really grabbed my attention was the harping of Hugh Hefner as a promoter of the LGBTetc. movement, took me another 12 years or so to find the work of Jay Dyer, E Micheal Jones and thekelly. Like Alex Jones, LaRouche was a gateway.

Chatkin avoids discussing the role of the Jew, in favor of blaming the BRC.
One has to consider how much Eustace Mullins and also Larouche and Tarpley owed to the work of Ezra Pound. The original and still in some ways most powerful “alt” thinker.
Noteworthy on Ezra Pound: at the end of his cantos, he apologizes for his “alt thinking” that marked some of his middle verses — you know, the love for Mussolini and denunciation of the jews.
Is this the definition of “alt thinking”?
It’s incredible: Webster Tarpley is the most mendacious pseudo historian I’ve seen, beyond crazy, a man that is pretty confident in the ignorance of his audience
Yeah, according to this people, the british crown, a wedding cake figurine, a puppet of the political-financial elite, is the master puppeteer of this world. Hiarious, only laughable. One time I heard Tarpley giving a conference about the lutheran revolt: according to the clown, Luther and the whole mayhem caused by him, as well as the Catholic response, especially Saint Igbatius, all of it was a play by a Cardinal Contarini, some type of demigod of the fifteenth century… Insane, over the top, remarcably crazy

IX.  An odd documentary (if documentary is the term) — the most noteworthy part is right at the start with Roger Stone offering praise for Larouche (“railroaded by Bush”.)  And here I reprise the question I had on Alex Jones…
… The relationship over?   Stone now never going to say the word “Larouche” ever again?

X.  Some odds and ends…

Like Dugin, Glazyev supports the convergence of left and right-wing ideas in the service of an illiberal geopolitical agenda, which often converge with older networks organized around the late fascist agitator and crank Lyndon LaRouche, who built a worldwide cult following based on conspiracy theories, economic doom, anti-Semitism, homophobia and racism. LaRouche network activists at the conferences have included Webster Tarpley and William Engdahl.……

One good result of Tuesday’s special election is that the public won’t accept racism, including connections to anti-Semitism and hate for Israel from the alt-right fringe groups growing in Queens and Manhattan, the way they accept nationally from the alt-left.  Republicans and Conservatives have rejected the racist overtones and questionable leadership of a few wannabe politicians who use social media to espouse threats, personal attacks and lies.
Their candidate of choice raised no money, received no endorsements from respected public figures and he came in with under 1% of the vote.  This is what happens when you choose to support the Lyndon LaRouche PAC, The Schiller Institute and align yourself with Neo-Nazis and hate groups.

XI.  Early rumblings of the “where’s the body” conspiracy theory

Also NB: or should that be N Morte: I find it hard to believe LL is still alive in his late 90s+ this may be simple lar to the rather suspicious death date given by Scientology Inc.’s house doctor for former SF writer turned creator of a religion “because thats where the money is” say many who heard him discussing plan to turn novel into Dianetics, the wealthy , er, religion’s Bible, a rewrite as truth of Slaves of Sleep, the late Harlan Ellison has writ on many occasions, including a note in Dangerous Visiobs, SF anthology

AND NOW THE POINT OF THIS RAMBLE: LL made campaign commercials each time he ran for president, all consisting of the candidate seated in a leather English Men’s Club chair, in front of a rather impressive looking home library rambling for 15-30 minutes, leading the viewer to come away with the feeling he was claiming Queen Elizabeth II and family were Iewish, and conspiring with other Jews to flood US streets wit heroin. Also, falsely, that he had recently met with, and advised(implying their support) of dozens of world leaders. This material, probably in the overptotected vaults of the Museum of Radio and Television, would be wonderful to show the quadrennial shift in the man’s views, and why he attracted so many for llowers, including a schizophrenic cousin of mine. Also, editor/authors seem to have missed out nature of the case that led to prison: LL’s minions working airports and other sites would talk people into making small cr d card donations to, usually the Fusion Foundation, then, especially if donors were elderly, invent and submit fraudulent cred card slips for donations several orders of magnitude larger, again, if memory serves.

Lyndon LaRouche, Right-wing conspiracy theorist who believed the Queen was a global drug-trafficker and who ran for US president eight times

Barking.  He should have been in the British House of Lords.

I though the Queen was a 14 foot lizard

There are competing theories.

This guy was a real piece of work. Far brighter than Donald Trump, LaRouche ended up qualifying for matching funds for his presidential run; screwed over thousands, if not millions … with misleading telemarketing campaigns and out-and-out credit card fraud, hauling in millions, which in the end were funneled down to him personally for his “expenses.”
He ended up doing hard time, but they didn’t lock him up forever. The great balance of his life, he lived like King George III.
I was down in Leesburg, Virginia, and got a look at his estate: armed guards everywhere. It looked like a pastoral version of Buckingham Palace.

I almost got him booked on a radio show I worked for once. Would have been wonderful talk radio fun. I do think he has coarsened political debate in the USA by quite a bit. Especially with his whole “Every President past Reagan is Hitler” rhetoric. His Space Elevator sounded like silly fun though. Also, he pretty much wrote the whole script for people wanting a return to Glass Steagal. He’s an interesting oddity. Should be a fun subject of future documentaries or movie dramas.

I don’t know the veracity of this story.  Was Lyndon Larouche running around anywhere in public in 1999?

 My own Lyndon LaRouche story: in 2004, he was at my high school’s mock democratic convention and spoke. Because his followers led with his opposition to the Iraq War, I briefly expressed interest and then realized how fucking insane it was.
RIP Lyndon LaRouche. You were born with the name of a guy who was destined to sell used Cadillacs and instead carved your own path as a failed politician.
Modern politics is such a fucking nightmare and yet it bums me out that college kids won’t see his blood and feces smeared fliers and handouts on campuses anymore. RIP to a real one
It has something to do with a cult, us against them. Anyone who’s ever been in a faction fight has more than likely demonized the opposition, no matter how close they are to you philosophically. Freud even had a name for that demonization, “the narcissism of small differences.” It’s us vs. evil. All morality is on our side.
From larouche materials:  [fn_4]. During the midday hours following the assassination of Robert Kennedy, I intervened to prevent Mark Rudd and his followers from mobilizing their intended plan to celebrate the assassination of that Presidential candidate. A leading member of that group of my adversaries, acceded to my warning that such an action by Rudd’s crew would have aroused the contempt of the population generally. [back to text for fn_4]  Rudd is older and wiser… or “Younger than that Now”.  If public opinion was the reason for larouche balking at this action, he was more keyed in on mass popular opinion than he was for the next fifty years.
From EIR, we see that the Rhode Island state House sleepily passed a resolution nodding at Larouche’s passing.    And you can watch it all go down, presumably, on the state’s variant of cspan if they archive those.  Well, here’s their guy in Rhode Island, Justin Price.

Lyndon LaRouche, by far the most adept political economist since Alexander Hamilton,

Apparently Nancy Spannaus has a new book out about Alexander Hamilton — with thanks to a few old cohorts in the Larouche org and someone from a legitimate Hamilton organization.  I suppose she’s trying something of the Tarpley approach — who could shove an anti-Bush conspiracy book into a launching point and sustaining mark for his career.  Though, it’s hard to see the ardor for Hamilton having such a shelf life.

the 99 percent and the 1 percent

March 19th, 2019

I made a mental note of an article in The Atlantic (I think it was The Atlantic), one I didn’t read but could gauge the headline’s premise with the supposition that the details don’t matter — calling College Athletics a welfare program supporting the upper income classes.  Think about it: we know the assortment of people (and on scholarship) from “the hoods” and whatnot playing the high profile football and basketball — but what is the income base for a high school that has a water polo or rugby or equestrian sports program?
As it were, as a new college scandal pops up — a star of Full House representative of someone paying her offspring into college off of a phony academic sports record! —  I now wonder if the writer for the Atlantic (I think it was the Atlantic) wasn’t trying for a bigger story, but couldn’t quite get the goods.

they ring out

March 15th, 2019

“I’m full blown for Bernie.”
“I don’t understand how Bernie didn’t get in 2016.  He would have swamped Trump.”
“Well, the DNC is massively corrupt.”

Tads of revisionism history, and partisan history on the fly, that will seep into their personal political narrative and will be a little difficult to entangle, as parts of it are true — so as to overwhelm larger issues.  There’s a lot of that.  We will never be able to acknowledge, for instance, the political weaknesses and limitations of Senator Robert Kennedy in 1968 — except maybe Pat Buchanan.

Interestingly this runs counter to the Hillary Clinton hagiography and pure victim of our misogynistic culture… with no room for anything else.  (The election was PAMIWI… Eye on the ball…) But it is.  As is.

a new mediocrity, but we won’t arrive at any gender equity until we expect the female superheroes to be as medicore as the male superheroes

March 13th, 2019

I have no dog in the fight.  Either Marvel Studios — Disney — needs to get the balance of male to female superheroes closer to a 50 /50 equity, and there’s a huge fanbase of (this generation enlightened enough) males who want to see female superheroes and females who want to see female superheroes, or there isn’t and the bulk of superheroes movies should be a bunch of dudes and the argument for this supposition is your fossilized dad.  Either makes some kind of sense, even as we insert the history of the comic book industry and where the glut of the adolescent male audience reading .

What I’m trying to ponder is… when I sit in the middle not all that interested in this as a controversy, and hear the applause for the first supposition and don’t necessarily know if it’s true…

… and understand, if I listed my favorite comic book movies, floating about would be Ghost World and — probably as a lark,m though the movie a weird cult following established — Josie and the Pussycats, so I’m not lacking for female protagonists…

I just understand how the superhero genre came to be defined as what it has been — and suppose that a more gender balanced comic book industry might still have the superhero genre as a bunch of damnable dudes while, you know, other genres pop into being alongside it…

and have no idea if breaking the mold means anything for feminism.  (Even if I found the feminist backlash against the feminist frontlash — expressed in The Nation — on Wonder Woman highly amusing.)

And I thought Captian Marvel was a dude?  Shazam and all that…

When they get around to doing a new Buffy the Vampire movie, that should be categorized as “superhero”… and it may even measure well with a superhero team composed of more females then males.

a life digested

March 12th, 2019

I.  1932.  A nine year old Quaker boy from Rochester, New Hampshire stands with his parents in a cluster of fellow tourists at Buckingham Palace.  To everyone’s surprise and delight, the Royal Family — The Queen Mum, King George, and young Elizabeth II — stride across… an error in coordination and scheduling.  They stop and smile and wave at the cheering crowd.  All except for Elizabeth, who instead focuses a glare off at the puzzled looking Quaker boy.  She then lobs him a rhaspberry and mouths those immortal words “Neener Neener.”  The British Royals walk on, the crowd of tourists buzzing with excitement at the unexpected meeting.  While, meantime, the young Quaker boy from Rochester begins to nurse the sting from his royal snubbing.
1968:  While teaching a course of Marxist economics at the radical Free University of New York, Lyndon Larouche wanders in and off the campus of Columbia University — then in the midst of a student led shut down and revolt.  He poaches a group of leftist students turned off by the Weather Underground and various Maoist sects and enthused by his call to bring Marxism to Mars.  But it is all a ruse and subterfuge — for at the first opportunity, Larouche will drop the pretense of Marxist Martian relations and lead his young cadre to its real mission: a 50 year struggle to avenge the personal snubbing he experienced at the age of 9 by the Diabolical Queen of England.

II.  1938.  Lyndon Larouche tries out for high school choir.  The teachers advising give their listen, and then a prompt set of thumbs down.  “We’re afraid your pitch is just too flat.”
Stung by the rejection, Larouche rejects their recommendation for voice lessons and settles on the real reason for his rejection: the teachers have bought into the idea that C = 261.1, up from the proper designation of the 19th century concert hall of C=256.
2004:  Lyndon Larouche sends his latest groupings of youth onto college campuses — ostensibly with the selling point of offering information exposing Dick Cheney through the latest expose Children of Satan 3: The Sexual Congress of Cultural Fascism.  But this set up masks the real purpose: to expose the college aged contingent to Beethoven sang at the proper pitch of 256, and damned those high school music teachers.

III.  1965.  A neglectful Lyndon Larouche falls asleep while watching The Man From Uncle and leaving the stove on in the kitchen.  His walks in to see a small electrical fire.  Lyndon Larouche walks into the kitchen.  “What we have here,” he says as his wife douses the flames with baking soda and suggests Lyndon Larouche be more careful in the future, “is another one of those Reichstag Fires.”

IV.  1974.  Lyndon Larouche assembles his NCLC to alert them to revelations that he is the target of an assassination plot by a gaggle of Cuban Frogmen.  The Labor Committees get to work, to stem the atack — unaware of one small piece of misunderstanding.  For when they hear “Cuban Frogmen”, they think in terms of military seals — when what Larouche was referring to was an unfortunate encounter in Little Havana with three belligerent street performers dressed in cheap knock off Kermit the Frog costumes.

V.  1976.  Lyndon Larouche looks down at a stack of a couple hundred copies of his latest handbill — “Stop Nelson Rockefeller’s Drive to World War 3″.  One of his members of the NCLC walks in and says “Big News.  Ford is dropping Rockefeller from the ticket.”
“Good riddance to the Second Most Evil Man of the Planet, and another victory for the Labor Committees!”
“So.  Should we pulp all those handbills now?”
“Hm,” Lyndon Larouche muses.  “Give me an hour and I’ll figure this one out.”
An hour later, Lyndon Larouche walks into the room with a stash of papers he’d just printed off that read “Jimmy Carter” over and over again.
“All right,” Lyndon Larouche tells his aid.  “Here’s a pair of scissors.  Here’s some paste.  Get to work cutting and pasting ‘Jimmy Carter’ over ‘Nelson Rockefeller’ on all these handbills.”
“But.  That’s take forever.”
“Do you or do you not want to stop Jimmy Carter’s drive to World War 3? … And understand, the world war 3 Jimmy Carter is launching won’t just be a world war, it won’t just be a nuclear war, it will be a thermonuclear war.”

VI.  1985.  Still smarting from his third straight failed run at the US Presidency, Lyndon Larouche hatches a desperate plan.  Select an up and coming Hollywood talent marked as the “Next Big Thing”, kidnap him and threaten him until he relents to place pro-Larouche material into their next project.  So it is Lyndon Larouche poses as a taxi driver and hovers around an unlikely figure for his projected “Next Big Thing”:  a young alt weekly cartoonist by the name of Matt Groening.  And when Matt Groening finally hails Lyndon Larouche’s taxi, it takes a while to sense something amiss.  And just when Groeing senses things getting a little uncomfortable, Larouche turns back and flashes Groening a creepy Cheshire grin, and says “Don’t you know who I am?”
“Er… no,” Matt Groeing says.
“I’m Lyndon Larouche.  I just ran for president.  Didn’t you see my infomercial where I exposed Walter Mondale as a wholly owned agent of the KGB, Socialist International, and Swedish Grain Cartel?”
“I guess I missed that one?”
“Look.  I am going to swerve this car into that ravine right now unless I get a pledge from you right now — In your next Big Production — whatever that may be — you will place an unmistakable message that I, Lyndon Larouche, was right all along.”
“Uh –”
“Don’t think I’m bluffing!”
Matt Groening quickly capitulates, and without saying a word Lyndon Larouche drives Groening back and drops him off at his requested designation.
1996.  Having long forgotten about his encounter with Lyndon Larouche, Matt Groening receives an ominous reminder in the mail.  Letters cut out ransom style from a magazine, the note reads “We Had an agreement”, followed by a pasted news blurb on Larouche’s release from prison, then the notice “Do your duty or I’ll expose you as I did Bertrand Russell,” and then a headline cut from a Larouchie screed: “Bertrand Russell: The Most Evil Man of the 20th Century”.
Matt Groening calls Dan Castellaneta into the studio to insert one additional line into the year’s “Treehouse of Horrors” Simpsons episode — with Homer Simpson blurting out “Aliens!  Bio-duplication!  Nude Conspiracies!  Oh My God!  Lyndon Larouche was right!”, and he hopes that this is enough to appease the man.

VII.  1985.  “We think we have a real shot in elections in Illinois next year, with Mark and Janice gunning for Lt. Governor and Secretary of State.  But… you’re both going to have to change your last names.  See — the greatest advantage Janice has against her opponent would appear to be that her opponent’s name has an unwieldy 5 to 2 vowel to consonant ratio, and frankly we right now are not in a position to take advantage.”
“What do you think I should change my name to?” asked Janice Poopsherpants.
“We’re thinking… the asses voting will want … a monosyllabic name that speaks to the heart.  So… Hart.  You’ll be Janice Hart.  As for you, Mark…”
“Yes?” said Mark Genghiskan.
“I think ‘Mark Fairchild’ will drive the greatest contrast against the candidate you’re opposing.”
“Who’s that?”
“George Satanchild.”

VIII.  1992.  A prison doctor suggests to Lyndon Larouche the advisability of removing some anal polyps.  “Is that all right?” he asks.
Lyndon Larouche stares at the doctor.  “Sure.  But only if you pass my rigorous screening process.  You understand, I am a man with many enemies.”
“Okay?”
“I’m going to ask a series of questions that will show your intentions.  Question #1: What do you know about Nicholas of Cusa?”
“Uh… nothing?”
“Ah hah!  That’s exactly what the Knights Templar, the enemies of Nicholas of Cusa, currently residing in the halls of the Keplerian faction of the Leesburg Garden Club– are trained to say.  Sorry.  But I cannot and will not allow you to poke your Agent Orange or whatever dynamite you’ve concocted into my anus.  My anal polyps remain.  Not only that, but I’m going to expose your plot to all the world like I did the assassination attempt from Castro’s Kermit Crew!”

IX.  2008.  Lyndon Larouche lectures before his “Larouche Youth Movement” cadre school.  He has written on the chalkboard a long list of names of “Great Leaders” and Statesmen in history, Promethean Souls who Transcended Humanity.
“One of the things a great deal of these Great Immortal Souls has in common,” Lyndon Larouche says to his young cadre, “is that — particularly toward the end of life — they had the companionship of a younger mistress.”
“Um,” one of the Larouche Youth cadres says.  “That’s the third time you’ve offered that observation.  Is there something you’re getting at?”
“Just recording the mutual benefits of a relationship which has historically advanced human history and culture against the sea of dionysian malthusian darkness.”
“Kind of an Anna Nicole Smith deal?”
“Psst.  Ix-nay on the Op-pay ulture-cay.  You don’t want to align with the Aristotlean Beastmen, do you?”
“In the right circumstances, you’ll find I can be an Aristotlean Beastman,” Larouche says.
The whole of the Larouche Youth cadre cringe in unison.
“Anyway, if you need some one on one with me, I’ll be in the office… … I mean, to discuss Beethoven or whatever… … …. Hegel’s cool with it…. … sigh.”
And the door slams.  Robert Beltran walks in from the side, wondering if he should shuttle “Romeo and Juliet” in favor of King Lear.

X.  2009.  It was not widely known, but Lyndon Larouche had a minor ownership share in the Boston furniture store ‘Leatherstocking Upholsteries”.   So he checked in to his majority owner partner and asked, “How’s business been?”
“Oh.  Great.  Except for one thing…”
“What’s that?” Lyndon Larouche asked.
“Well.  We have this massive back stock of dining room tables.  We need to get rid of these dining room tables.  If only we could get it into people’s minds, the purchasing of dining room tables… even subliminally.”
“You know,” said Lyndon Larouche.  “I think I have an idea!”
Lyndon Larouche then called up his old friend, Congressman Barney Frank.
“Hey!” said Barney Frank.  “Been a while.  You know, I really owe you one for how you relieved the media spotlight on me during my sordid sex related scandal by running that wacky candidate of yours against me.”
“Yeah, well” Lyndon Larouche said.  “I’ calling in the favor right now.  So, at your next town hall, I will have one of my followerers waving one of my ‘Obama with Hitler mustache’ things at you and denouncing the ACA as Hitler’s Health Care Policy…”
“Still going back to the oldies, huh?”
“I need you to insult her –”
“Sounds easy!”
“– By referring to her as a ‘dining room table’.”
“But.  That doesn’t make any sense.”
“It is imperative that you refer to her as a dining room table.”
“But.  Can’t I think of something more … witty?”
“No.  It must be ‘dining room table’.”
“But –”
“Do this.  Or I’ll expose you like I did Bertrand Russell.”

XI.  2014.  Lyndon Larouche flips through a thousand copies of his latest handbill — “Pass Glass Steagall Now Or Thermonuclear War in March.”
“Yeeowtch!” he yells.
His wife rushes in.  “What’s wrong, dear?”
“Quick.  Get me a band aid.  It seems I have on my hands another one of those… Reichstag Paper cuts.”

XII.  2016.  Lyndon Larouche sits in Moscow with two emissaries of the Russian government.
“So let me see if I understand this,” Lyndon Larouche says.  “You want us — basically a kind of reprise of a conspiracy theory we ran in the early 90s with George Bush and a pedophile ring out of Nebraska — to claim a pedophile ring is based at a Virginia pizza parlor?”
“No.” The Russian agent says.  “We’re asking you to refrain from this story.  Because if you did this story — the paranoid fringe will dismiss it with a ‘Oh, that’s Lyndon Larouche.’  We’ll be passing that sotry on to someone with more credibility — Alex Jones.”
“Huh.  Okay.  And if we do as you suggest — and don’t report on this pizza parlor pedophile ring.  What’s in it for us?”
“Well.  When the times comes.  If and when a President Trump crosses us in NATO policy or the Crimean.  We will give you first dibs on… video footage of Donald Trump getting urinated on.”
“Uh –” Lyndon Larouche says.  It is the last phrase he would ever utter.