Dick Morris’s punditry always stikes me as… off.

He’s picked up on this meme.

The implications of his opinions are startling:

So… No terror attack means that Osama wants Kerry to be the president. Odd, since Bush partisans are always quick to say “We haven’t had a terror attack, so re-elect Bush!”

But, and we all know where I’m going, follow me here:

So, the key issue is whether America is at war or at peace. And Osama bin Laden has more to say about that than any other person. If he ratchets up the terror threat to the United States and has us looking over our shoulders and thinking twice before we fly, we will feel at war and will back Bush. But if he lets up and backs off for the election, we will revert back to our peacetime posture and likely elect the Democrat.

Replace the name Osama with Bush.

And George Bush has more to say about that than any other person. If he ratchets up the terror threat* to the United States and has us looking over our shoulders and thinking twice before we fly, we will feel at war and will back Bush.

* Up to “Orange Alert”, you see… and release 4 year old information if you must, you see…

Still, Dick Morris does suggest that Osama might “want” Bush… “Hardliner” against “Hardliner”. He can rationalize the “Spain Situation” (“Appeasement”, he and the NY Post readers believe) as part of the Grand Osama Strategy.

Still, if there were a Terrorist Attack a week or two after the election of John Kerry — the Dick Morrises — or more potently the Dick Morris readers of the world– would have their heads explode, the idea being that Osama wants Kerry, and post-poned their attack to mock us.

And the Election Deserves to go the other way, you see, because we must be strong… as so Kerry Must Be Strong.

It gets a little absurder all the time. I tend to think that one Infidel Crusading Zionist, from the vantage point of Bin Laden, is as bad as another Infidel Crusading Zionist — but we have notes saying that Al Qaeda prefers Bush and we have notes saying … well, I think we have notes saying they prefer Kerry…

Though those notes are lessons in reverse-psychology.

Unless they’re lessons in double-reverse psychology.

Who is Estes Kefauver? What made him tick? How did he situate himself for a run at the presidency in 1952 and 1956?

Well… We start with 3 factoids gathered at an online encyclopedia:

He led a U.S. Senate committee investigating organized crime in 1950 that brought him national attention.
In 1952 he defeated President Harry S Truman in the New Hampshire Primary, but was eventually defeated for the Presidential nomination by governor of Illinois Adlai E. Stevenson.
Although a Southerner, Kefauver was hated by many his fellow Southerners for his liberal position on civil rights and his independence (the Southern Senators usually voted in a bloc).

And then there’s:

due no doubt in part to Kefauver’s trademark, a coonskin cap which so effectively connected him with the Davy Crockett craze of the 1950’s.

Support for civil rights probably puts him ahead of Adlai Stevenson… and for that matter, John Kennedy for the 1950s — whose 1960 run for the presidency was considered a rightward shift for the Democratic Party — Eleanore Roosevelt spoke out against him at the DNC Convention.

The much heralded committee investigating organized crime (which, apparently, made legendary “The Mob”… without Kefauver there would be no “Sopranos”) set him up to investigate juvenile crime, which set him up to the more obscure (except in certain, more geeky circles) hearings against comic books — and that lead to the publisher of Archie Comics creating this governing body to punish the publisher of EC Comics… (Note that General Standards B 1 bans the name of the latter company’s best selling titles.) Interesting stuff, I say.

Kefauver: This seems to be a man with a bloody ax holding a woman’s head up which has been severed from her body. Do you think that is in good taste?

Gaines: I think so.

Beyond that, his political enemies accused him of being a Communist (I wonder if his name was on that list that Joe McCarthy’s waved around):

It was during the Democratic primary campaign in 1948 that Crump attempted to identify Kefauver in the minds of Tennessee voters as a fellow-traveler with communists and liberals by characterizing him as an instrument of unsavory “pinkos and communists” who worked on their behalf like the stealthy, nocturnal raccoon. Kefauver responded in a speech delivered in Crump’s stronghold of Memphis. Pulling on a coonskin cap, Kefauver retorted, “I may be a pet coon, but I’m not Boss Crump’s pet coon.”

And he and Senator Al Gore were staunchly pro – civil rights:

he and his colleague from Tennessee, former U.S. Senator Albert Gore Sr., were the only members of the Senate from the South who categorically refused to sign the so-called Southern Manifesto in 1957, which the reactionary Southern congressional bloc issued in response to the United States Supreme Court’s desegregation decision in Brown v. Board of Education.

So, that’s Estes Kefauver.

He ended Truman’s career. He popularized the Mob. He kept Tennessee from being a majour boiling point in the Civil Rights struggle. And he wore a Davy Crokett Coonskin hat.

Am I missing anything?

Alan Keyes comes out swinging , advocating abolishing the 17th Amendment which took the election of Senators away from State Governments and gave it to the popular vote.

“The balance is utterly destroyed when the senators are directly elected because the state government as such no longer plays any role in the deliberations at the federal level.”

Unfortunately, when Alan Keyes serves this first term in office, he probably won’t have many Senators lining up to attach their names to this Constitutional Amendment. Zell Miller is retiring, after all.

Barack Obama issued a statement:

I certainly trust the people of Illinois to choose who they want to represent them in the U.S. Senate. That is the very basis of our democracy.

But that’s just pandering…

(Of some interest is this biographical jottings for the four black Senators in US History… a list Obama will join next January.)

Like it or not, he does make for an interesting election year story. Having his name indexed in my blogoroll, the split is pretty even between Republicans who think he’s the bee’s knees and Democrats who think he’s slime.

If you want to catch him discussing politics, well… there’s about a 1 in 3 chance that Zell Miller is on today’s Sean Hannity’s show (either his tv show or his radio show).

He helped make Bill Clinton. He moved the Georgia primary up before the 1992 primary battles, seemingly for the sole purpose of helping Clinton get some momentum for the Super Tuesday states. I guess his paltry reward was the keynote speech at the DNC Convention … Which, we’ll get to compare with his 2004 RNC Convention speech. (Not sure when Kid Rock performs.)

I guess I should read his book to see if I can gain any sympathetic understanding of his political path from moderate Democrat to Conservative Democrat to Right-Wing Zealot. Considering my puzzlement over some of his statements: (while this one has some vague logic to it this one just makes no sense at all.

… This blogger points out some Zell Miller self-aware symbolism: his Senate website has a photograph of Miller next to two yellow dogs. Twice the potency, I suppose.

It’s up to Cooter from Dukes of Hazard to sort out Zell Miller…

Forget everything, though.

In case you’re looking for a reason to vote for Kerry, and not simply against Bush, here it is:

“What people need to understand is that this is just a moment in time. This is just one election,” Miller said. “And after the Kerry defeat, I’m going to be around to put this party back together again.”

Forget the “Republican Lite” that Dean gained traction campaigning against, I’m not terribly interested in seeing Zell Miller create the party into his own image — Republican Heavy, if you will…

Sure, Sure, Sure. Everyone knows that Dick Cheney said this: America has been in too many wars for any of our wishes, but not a one of them was won by being sensitive. Those who threaten us and kill innocents around the world do not need to be treated more sensitively. They need to be destroyed. AND President Lincoln and Gen. Grant did not wage sensitive wars. Nor did President Roosevelt or Gens. Eisenhower and MacArthur. […] A sensitive war will not destroy the evil men who killed 3,000 Americans. … The men who beheaded Daniel Pearl and Paul Johnson will not be impressed by our sensitivity.

WOO-HOP, everyone. WOO-HOP!!

In response to John Kerry saying this: I believe I can fight a more effective, more thoughtful, more strategic, more proactive, more sensitive war on terror that reaches out to other nations and brings them to our side and lives up to American values in history.

Just before Cheney took the stage, with wife gazing at him lovingly, and followed by wife saying “I just kind of shook my head when I heard that. With all due respect to the senator, it just sounded so foolish. I can’t imagine that al-Qaida is going to be impressed by sensitivity.”

— as everyone knows, George Bush said shortly after John Kerry spoke of sensitivity,… well…

Jon Stewart is my hero.

Actually I haven’t had a chance to see if that’s the clip I want, but nevermind… as we all know, Bush said thiseth:

Now in terms of the balance between running down intelligence and bringing people to justice obviously is – we need to be very sensitive on that.

And Cheney said this.

But that’s too easy.

How about typing “sensitive” and “sensitivity” into the search engine at whitehouse.gov and seeing how many times Bush Administration used the words in matters of warriordom? Here’s a start, or maybe a finish.

In honour of the minor controversy about John Kerry’s whereabouts on a Christmas Day near, in, or at Combodia (go to right wing radio, or Free Republic, or such sources for more information of some sort)… here’s The Dead Kennedys:

So you been to school for a year or two
And you know you’ve seen it all
In daddy’s car thinkin’ you’ll go far
Back east your type don’t crawl
Play ethnicky jazz to parade your snazz
On your five grand stereo
Braggin that you know how the niggers feel cold
And the slums got so much soul

It’s time to taste what you most fear
Right Guard will not help you here
Brace yourself, my dear

It’s a holiday in Cambodia
It’s tough kid, but it’s life
It’s a holiday in Cambodia
Don’t forget to pack a wife

Your a star-belly sneech you suck like a leech
You want everyone to act like you
Kiss ass while you bitch so you can get rich
But your boss gets richer on you
Well you’ll work harder with a gun in your back
For a bowl of rice a day
Slave for soldiers til you starve
Then your head skewered on a stake
Now you can go where people are one
Now you can go where they get things done
What you need my son:

Is a holiday in Cambodia
Where people dress in black
A holiday in Cambodia
Where you’ll kiss ass or crack

Pol Pot, Pol Pot, Pol Pot, Pol Pot [etc.]

And it’s a holiday in Cambodia
Where you’ll do what you’re told
A holiday in Cambodia
Where the slums got so much soul

I Fought the Law (and I Won)
Drinkin’ beer in the hot sun
I fought the law and I won

I needed sex and I got mine
I fought the law and I won

The law don’t mean shit if you’ve got the right friends
That’s how the country’s run
Twinkies are the best friend I’ve ever had
I fought the law
And I won

I blew George & Harvey’s brains out with my six-gun
I fought the law and I won

Gonna write my book and make a million
I fought the law and I won

I’m the new folk hero of the Ku Klux Klan
My cop friends think that’s fine
You can get away with murder if you’ve got a badge
I fought the law
And I won
I am the law
So I won

Tommy Franks made him do it. (And I thought it was Rove…)

NOVAK:

The general wanted to declare the fighting over in hopes other countries would send troops to Iraq. You can hardly blame the president for following the advice of his general. Sadly, the Europeans did not send any troops to Iraq, and they won’t unless they get their price.

He declared victory to try to get other countries to send in their troops.

So, Bush did that stunt to fool the French into thinking that the war was over so that they’d send their kids die in our unjustified war?

I’m confused.