Phrases overheard on one end of a cell phone conversation

(on public trasnsportation)

“… friends with benefits, you know.  Won’t handle anything more right now.”
“Tough life with mistakes made during my 36 years.  But I kicked my habit.  The Penitentary helped with that.”
“Laying low.  My job opportunities are improving slightly.”
“Oh man.  I’ve been seeing my 16 year old a bit lately.  He’s been making some of the same mistakes I had.  It just doesn’t make sense.”
“I’m going to have to get a Paternity Test for that one.  He sure looks like me, but I need to make sure, y’know?”
“Yeah.  I’ll go see her.  I’ll call back later tonight for a Booty Call.  Got that?”

And then he got off the Max.

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