Don’t Look Back. You can Never Look Back.
I was born in a small town. I was raised in a small town.
There is a wikipedia article about the small town. Your encyclopedic information, more or less firmly in place. Go into the history anals of the wikipedia address and I imagine these are fairly typical temporary contributions to this subject of article. Go look at your small town and see if there are any similarities!
 ghetto ass little village right smack in the middle of
FUCK G-CITY!
These two additions were made on the same day by the same user. They were deleted three days later. Then, a couple of days later someone added something more… positive, along the lines of a “Woot!”
It was the hometown of the awesome [name] Brothers, [name] and [name]
Represent!
Deleted the same day.
The only person in the “notable residents” list was added at about this time, by someone who is apparently an aficinado in the field of this genre of things — a voice actor who did some radio stints way back, and starred in a famous cartoon in the late 1960s and early 1970s (which the courts ruled were not owned by Dan Decarlo), and is now on a “Focus on the Family” radio theater.
Then we get back to this:
fuck this city for real
A “bot” deleted that edit. Bots will delete a lot of these contributions.
And then, more bored teenager hi-jinks:
hershey highway heading straight to your ass
This remained there for two weeks. The bot wasn’t operating correctly.
Apparently seeing the addition of a “notable person” category, someone threw a lob to…
[name] a nazi general from World War III he killed twenty six people with his bare hands. He discriminates against all imigrants from foreign lands and hate towards the people of mexico.
Which, I can only guess he shared this with a friend, as someone added this the next day:
He created the Stranger, a technique known as sitting on your hand until it goes numb and the you masterbate with it
This person created an account, which was quickly deleted, and the only thing I can say is that his contributions for the neighboring small town are modestly more clever… modestly.
Someone added a college football player to the “notable person” category several months later, which I guess is a new addition to the “woot” category. (Curiously he had to edit it twice to decide whether it was proper to leave the state or required a “University of” state.)  It was deleted by a wikipedia editor who deemed him not sufficiently notable. But only after nine months. The college football player got his nine months in the sun on wikipedia. Maybe he was benched at that point?
At last our depressed small town teenage vandals came up with something… anything.:
After the battle of Choxulla. General [name] defeated the dreaded purple orangutan of doom, Dreaded purple Orandgutan of doom was the dictador of Choxulla, he ruled with an iron fist for 200 years and forced his people to learn the dark form of majic that he was so fond of. Untill [name] destroyed the Dreaded Purple Orangutan of Doom, and his satanist followers in the battle of Choxulla were 73.5 percent of the inhabitants were killed. Afterwards he cristened the the new city [city name], and ended the use of magic and it was instantly replaced by rigorous training in Physics and technology. [Name] ruled 70 years from 1909-1979, [Name] ruled with an Iron Fist as well, but was considered more responsible because he could actually relate to the Human/Elven/Creaton inhabitants better than the Dreaded Orangutan of Doom. [Name] kept the city very clean/neat and kept his people under a military lifestyle and soon [city name] gained a reputation for being very diciplined and highly skilled in their sciences. Skarks rule was constantly seeing resistace from the elven race which highly agreed with the used of magic, and seeked a more free and relaxed form of government. The Creaton race (Creatons are animals wich have magic in their blood and have reached a higher level of conciousness) also were a great source of resistance, they still held rage at stark for killing their king the Dreaded Purple Orangutan of Doom, and seeked to regain their rightfull place as rulers.
This was deleted two hours later.
His contributions to the neighboring town are shorter, though no less creative.
We get another “woot” for the “notable residents” list:
[Name] — really nice guy
Deleted immediately. And back to some hometown love:
May it be noted that its a peice of shit town that would burn to the ground it the world had any justice. Seriously this place should eat shit and die.
Deleted eleven minutes later.
Some racial issue:
lots of meskins live there since 1990’s
Deleted a minute later.
The football player was added again. This time he had a much shorter stint — he made it for eighteen minutes.
And… more hometown love:
settlement type = HEHOLE! (SIC?)
nickname = WHERE FUN GOES TO DIE!
motto = WE WILL CONSUME EVERYTHING THAT YOU REPRESENT!
It will alwhays live in the gut of a giant turtle who likes to consume the souls of orphans and hates YOU!
Looking at his contributions, I’m impressed he tacked to a contribution for an old Speaker of the House of the first part of the twentieth century, and less impressed that his contribution was to note that he was “really gay. Ha Ha Ha!”
More racial fun. To a statistical round-up of demographics, after listing Africans Americans in a tiny percentage, someone adds: “(Thank god!)”Â
In the same editing binge, we have notable resident:
[Name], town douchebag
And he does the honors of deleting his own contributions.
And…
In more recent years the town has become overrun with gangs and troublemakers. Some local residents have nicknamed the town Compton. Compton, CA is well known throughout the world for it’s gang violence and dangerous neighborhoods. Although anyone who has ever been there would agree it’s a much safer place to live.
Some standard issue homophobia, possibly reference to some local person.
[Name]- Local penis sucker – Can almost always be found at one of the local glory holes.
Both deleted… immediately.
Two edits made at the same time:
crap hole
Fine. I suppose he’s sliding that in with:
The official language is Spanish.
And so it goes.
Um… It gets better? Maybe?