Celebrity ASS-OFF

Let’s play Celebrity ASS – OFF.

Contestant Number One:  Michael Jordan.  From Jordan’s “Hall of Fame” speech.  Wherein Michael Jordan expounded on what spurred him on to Greatness.  A long list of people who dissed him throughout his career.  As well, various other sundry grudges that he decided to address.  Two key lines:

Jerry’s not here.  [Jerry Krause; Bulls owner] I don’t know who’d invite him. I didn’t. I hope he understands it goes a long way. He’s a very competitive person. I was a very competitive person. He said organizations win championships. I said, ‘I didn’t see organizations playing with the flu in Utah. I didn’t see it playing with a bad ankle.


Leroy Smith.  You guys think that’s a myth.  Leroy Smith was a guy that when I got cut he made the team on the varsity team. He’s still the same 6-7 guy, he’s not any bigger and his game is probably the same.

It is more or less a myth — A bit more to that story.

Contestant Number Two.  Kanye West:   Taylor Swift got a surprise when she accepted the award for Best Female Video at Sunday night’s MTV Video Music Awards.

After Swift, looking shocked, beat out Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Kelly Clarkson, Pink and Beyonce for the honor, she took the stage and accepted the award. As she was thanking MTV, Kanye West ran up on stage, took her microphone, and said Beyonce had been robbed for her “Single Ladies” video.

“Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time!”

Swift, 19, stood silently holding her trophy, cameras cut to Beyonce looking stunned in the crowd, and MTV then cut to break.

And ad naseum from there.  A profuse number of apologies.  And one off-the-record comment from the president that nobody should pay any mind to, frankly.  Though, I just did.

Good for all three’s career, I suppose.

Contestant Number three:  Serena Williams.  Poor Sportsmanship.  Common in Tennis.  We just noticed because of her gender.

Williams, 27, says she was “in the moment” and doesn’t really remember her now-famous outburst at a line judge who had called a foot fault. It was a 12-second verbal attack that that has played over and over for three days.

“It was a really tough point in the match and it was really close and, got a really tough call that wasn’t the correct call, and, you know, things got a little heated and I had a conversation with the line judge that didn’t go so well,” Williams told CNN.

Contestant Number Four.  Congress-critter Joe Wilson.  I, frankly, would not be inclined to throw him into the “Celebrity Ass-Off”, except that the “apology” is… um… a fund raising political message.  (Note: I would post a clean feed, but I don’t want to look past the first sure item that appears on a youtube search.)

Who wins?

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