{"id":731,"date":"2005-03-02T15:01:57","date_gmt":"2005-03-02T22:01:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/?p=731"},"modified":"2005-03-02T15:01:57","modified_gmt":"2005-03-02T22:01:57","slug":"kentucky-high-school-over-run-by-zombies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/2005\/03\/02\/kentucky-high-school-over-run-by-zombies\/","title":{"rendered":"Kentucky High School Over-run by Zombies"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/a>Well, let’s get to it<\/a>, shall we? <\/p>\n

A George Rogers Clark High School junior arrested Tuesday for making terrorist threats told LEX 18 News Thursday that the “writings” that got him arrested are being taken out of context.<\/i><\/p>\n

I don’t know how big a deal this is, but why is the word “writings” written in quotation marks?<\/p>\n

Winchester police say William Poole, 18, was taken into custody Tuesday morning. Investigators say they discovered materials at Poole’s home that outline possible acts of violence aimed at students, teachers, and police. <\/i><\/p>\n

… And Fluffy the Cat? (I’m always going to interject “Fluffy the Cat” when I happen upon stories such as this one… You know that, don’t you?)<\/p>\n

Poole told LEX 18 that the whole incident is a big misunderstanding. He claims that what his grandparents found in his journal and turned into police was a short story he wrote for English class. <\/p>\n

“My story is based on fiction,” said Poole, who faces a second-degree felony terrorist threatening charge. “It’s a fake story. I made it up. I’ve been working on one of my short stories, (and) the short story they found was about zombies. Yes, it did say a high school. It was about a high school over ran by zombies.”<\/i><\/p>\n

Yes, dear Poole. But, don’t you see… all<\/i> high schools are over-run by zombies! You can’t rely on the over-familiar — you need something a bit more exotic or you’ll lose your audience.<\/p>\n

Even so, police say the nature of the story makes it a felony. “Anytime you make any threat or possess matter involving a school or function it’s a felony in the state of Kentucky,” said Winchester Police detective Steven Caudill.<\/i><\/p>\n

The Winchester Police Department, evidentally, is over-run by zombies too. That needs to be his sequel. Only he’ll probably have to change the name to avoid suspicion or dancing to close to “Terrorist Threats”. Maybe call it the Pinheadster Police Department<\/i>. (I’m willing to donate a notebook and pen so that he can write it while waiting for bond or arraignment in his jail cell.)<\/p>\n

“It didn’t mention nobody who lives in Clark County, didn’t mention (George Rogers Clark High School), didn’t mention no principal or cops, nothing,”
\nsaid Poole. “Half the people at high school know me. They know I’m not that stupid, that crazy.”<\/i><\/p>\n

So, half the people at George Rogers Clark High School knew Poole, eh? The other half probably thought he was a freak. Or maybe half the people who knew him thought he was a freak, and half the people who didn’t didn’t think he was a freak. Calculating such percentages is a tough business.<\/p>\n

On Thursday, a judge raised Poole’s bond from one to five thousand dollars after prosecutors requested it, citing the seriousness of the charge.<\/i><\/p>\n

And so it goes…<\/p>\n

In the bastions of Pinkwater-related rumours (an obscure Internet reference, circa late 1990s), Pinkwater was in some stage of writing — perhaps entirely written but never-to-be-published, a third “Snarkout Boys” book entitled I Snarked With a Zombie<\/u>.<\/p>\n

But the premise in Lizard Music<\/a> serves as much purpose as anything else. Our hero, Victor, becomes aware that everyone around him is pod-person.<\/p>\n

“Now, what’s this about pod people?”<\/p>\n

“Last night I began to notice that there were these people on television… They aren’t regular humans — it’s hard to explain — something about them doesn’t make sense. They seem to — they seem to –”<\/p>\n

“They seem to be going through the motions of being humans without really meaning it or understanding it.”<\/p>\n

“That’s it. They’re real but they’re not. It got me thinking about this movie where pods from space come down, and replicas of the real people come out and replace everyone.”<\/p>\n

“I’ve seen the movie. Everyone has. It’s an excellent film, but not entirely accurate. You see, the pod people, as you like to call them, are not from another planet. They are ordinary people who have developed in a certain way. It can happen to anyone, if they’re unlucky.”<\/p>\n

“That’s even scarier than being invaded from space… What makes people get that way?<\/p>\n

“Nobody seems to know. There’s a lot of it going around.”<\/p>\n

“It’s a serious problem, isn’t it?”<\/p>\n

“Oh yes, it’s a problem, but it doesn’t do to worry about it too much. Somehow, people who get all concerned about podism usually seem to wind up catching it.”<\/i><\/p>\n

I don’t know what Poole was getting at with his zombies. Perhaps it was a Revenge Fantasy of some sort. Perhaps it was an erudite commentary on society at large. It was probably neither, though.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Well, let’s get to it, shall we? A George Rogers Clark High School junior arrested Tuesday for making terrorist threats told LEX 18 News Thursday that the “writings” that got him arrested are being taken out of context. I don’t know how big a deal this is, but why is the word “writings” written in […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-731","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/731","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=731"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/731\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=731"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=731"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.struat.com\/election\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=731"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}